


A Hidden Life

by JemWithA_J



Category: Law & Order: UK
Genre: Domestic Violence, Explicit Language, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-28
Updated: 2020-03-28
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:20:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23366083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JemWithA_J/pseuds/JemWithA_J
Summary: You found yourself falling for Matty. But you knew you couldn’t allow yourself to take it any further. Because you had a hidden life he knew nothing about and there was no way you could escape it.
Relationships: Matt Devlin/Reader
Kudos: 2





	1. Chapter 1

You had felt yourself growing closer to Matty over the last few weeks since you had begun working with him. There was an instant connection as friends and deep down you felt it could be more. You thought that maybe he did too. But it couldn’t. As much as you wanted it to, it couldn’t. And it wasn’t fair on him to keep leading him on.

“Ha! Yes! Did you see that shot? That’s skill that is!”

“That was pure luck Sunshine. No skill about it.”

You heard Matty and Ronnie’s playful bickering over the wastepaper basketball hoop at the desk behind you. Normally you would turn round and join in, agreeing with Ronnie just to wind Matt up but you couldn’t bring yourself to do it. You had taken it too far and now you were worried that anything you said or did would lead him on further. You heard Matty call your name but you didn’t turn around.

“Come on, settle this for us will you. Was that, or was that not a bloody brilliant shot?”

“I’m working, Matt.”

You said as normally as you could, though the lump of emotion in your throat made it difficult to even speak. Matty looked at you in confusion.

“What’s up?”

“Nothing!” You said, sharper than you intended, focusing intently on your computer screen, “I’m just busy, that’s all…”

“I know something’s wrong. You can talk to me, you know you can.”

“Matt, please, leave me, I’m fine…”

“You’re not…”

“Just leave me alone!”

You screamed as the tears sprung from your eyes and you got up from your desk, files clattering to the floor as you rushed from the room away from him. Matty looked over at Ronnie in complete bafflement and he gave a shrug of confusion in return. It was only yesterday that you had been laughing and joking like usual, making plans to nip to the pub after work today to celebrate a case you had just closed. Nothing had happened since then so Matty couldn’t understand the sudden change in your mood towards him. As he got up from his chair to go after you, Ronnie grabbed his arm.

“Might be best to leave her for a while, Son.” 

He said gently but Matty shook his head.

“This isn’t like her. Something's happened and I need to know what.”

Before Ronnie could say another word, Matty had left the room in the direction you ran.

You had searched for an empty interview room until you found the one at the end of the corridor. You slid the ‘engaged’ sign across, not that you thought that would stop him in any way. And just as you say down at the desk you heard the knock at the door. He opened it and you couldn’t bear the look of worry on his face.

“Matt, please…”

“I just need to know you’re ok…”

“I’m fine, please, just let me have a few moments…”

“I know you aren’t fine. Please. Have I done something to upset you?”

He looked heartbroken at the very idea that it was him that had made you feel this way and you shook your head but that just made the tears fall harder.

“You can talk to me. You know you can.” He said, softly, “Please…”

You wanted to. You desperately wanted to but you knew you couldn’t. And you couldn’t bear to see the pain in his face any longer. You got up from the desk and tried to rush past him. But he caught hold of your arm to stop you and you winced in pain. His brow furrowed in confusion as he looked at you, he went to lift the sleeve of your jumper with his gentle fingers.

“Matty no…”

It was too late. Matty was sickened as he saw the dark purple bruising to your wrist and the unmistakable mark of where someone had placed the tip of a lit cigarette.

“I’m sorry…”

You whispered as you pulled your wrist from his grasp, turning away from him as you wrapped your arms around yourself and sobbed. Matt just stared at you, wanting to reach out and touch you but he didn’t want to hurt you any more.

“Don’t say sorry.” He said eventually, shaking his head, “What on earth do you have to be sorry for?”

“I...lied... to you…” 

You choked out, still facing the wall, unable to look at him. Then suddenly your legs felt like jelly as you started to hyperventilate and you thought you were going to pass out until you felt his strong arms around you, guiding you over to the interview desk. As he sat you down in one of the chairs he crouched down next to you, looking straight into your eyes.

“I don’t care what you did.” He said, softly, “All I care about is finding out why you are so upset and why your arm is in that state.”

You took a deep breath, looking at him as he silently willed you on with his blue eyes.

“I’ve got a boyfriend.” You began eventually, your voice wavering but steadier than earlier, “His name is Dave. He was my first boyfriend. The only man I’ve ever...been with.”

You thought this might make him angry. Your anxious, guilt ridden brain making you think that. But if he was, then his face didn’t show it. All you saw was worry and hurt and the more you looked at him the more you wished that this could just be so simple. That you and him could be more than just friends.

“He gets jealous. He always has done. And I thought at first it was...flattering. That he wanted me all for himself. But then one night we were in a pub and I dropped my purse. A guy picked it up for me and I smiled and thanked him. For the rest of the night Dave wouldn’t speak to me. I didn’t understand. Then when we got home...he grabbed hold of me, twisting my skin so tightly that it bruised. I screamed at him to let me go...but all he kept saying is that I was flirting with someone else. That I was a slapper. That I didn’t love him enough. He punched me in the stomach then kicked me whilst I was down on the floor. I thought he’d never stop. That was three years ago.”

Matt just stared at you horrified.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He said eventually, “We could have helped...I could have helped…”

“I didn’t want to bring that here.” You whispered, “At work I could feel like someone else. Just for a few hours. I could pretend to be the girl I wish I could be. I could laugh and joke and smile and forget everything else. But…”

You stopped, turning away from him again. You felt his arm at your shoulder and you didn’t shrug him off even though you knew you should. You felt comforted by his touch and eventually you turned back towards him.

“Part of me desperately wanted this ‘other’ me to be real. The one you saw everyday. And I’m sorry. Because I feel as though I led you on. I could feel myself growing closer to you and I should have stopped myself because I knew it couldn’t be. As much as I wanted it to…”

You looked up at him. His eyes had never left you from the moment he walked in the room.

“You have nothing to be sorry for.” He said, gently, “Nothing at all. You never led me on. If anything I should be the one apologising. Because maybe I came on too strong…”

He stopped suddenly, the look on his face turning to one of horror and you knew instantly what he was thinking.

“No…” You shook your head, reaching out to grasp his hand, “Don’t even think about blaming yourself for this. Dave always thinks that I’m flirting with or seeing other people. I can’t be happy around him. Because even if I’m smiling he’s accusing me of cheating on him with someone else. Please Matt. This isn’t your fault.”

You carried on looking at him. You could see his cheek twitching with the emotion he was fighting so hard to keep in check. You hated the fact that he blamed himself for this and you knew that there was nothing you could say to convince him otherwise. He placed his other hand over the one you held his in, enveloping it.

“You aren’t going home tonight.”

“Matt...I can’t. He’ll go mad…”

“He isn’t coming anywhere near you again.” He soothed, gently, “You can stay here in the On Call room. I’ll stay outside, I’ll make sure you’re safe.”

“Matt. You’ve been at work all day. You can’t stay here all night too. You need rest…”

“Do you think I’ll be able to get any rest knowing what I know now?” He said, shaking his head, “I’m going to look after you, OK? I want you to get a proper night’s sleep in a safe place away from him. Then tomorrow, if you feel up to it, I’ll help you make a statement. He’s hurt you for the last time. I promise.”

You blinked away the tears in your eyes as you looked at him. You felt the weight of the world lift from your shoulders at his words and for the first time without fear or guilt or worry you placed your arms around him and he held you close as you cried into his shoulder.


	2. Chapter 2

You knew Dave would end up coming to find you. You just knew it. And you were scared. Not just for you but for Matty. You didn’t want him to get hurt or into any trouble. But you also knew that the station was the safest place for you to be and deep down you relished the chance of a decent night’s sleep where you didn’t have to worry about saying the wrong thing or looking at Dave in the wrong way and getting smacked as a result. You heard a knock at the door as you sat sorting out the little On Call room and you knew it was Matt who had gone to get you something to wear for bed but you waited to hear his voice just to make sure.

“Hey, it’s Matt. Am I ok to come in?”

You called back, letting him know it was and as he walked in carrying some joggers and a tshirt he gave you a small smile before closing the door behind him.

“You gonna be ok in here?” 

He asked as he handed you the neatly folded clothes. You nodded.

“Thank you.”

You smiled and he placed a gentle hand against your arm.

“I’ll leave you to get settled.” He said as he turned back towards the door, “I’ll be just outside OK?”

“Matt...wait.”

He stopped at your words, turning back towards you, a frown of confusion upon his face. You felt the emotion creeping up in your throat but you swallowed it down.

“Will you...stay? If...if I’m going to make a statement tomorrow I...I know I will have to show someone what he’s...done to me. And I’d feel...better. More...comfortable if someone I trusted saw it first…”

As soon as you saw the look on his face you wished you’d never spoken.

“I’m sorry, Matty...I shouldn’t have asked that of you. Forget it. I’m sorry I…”

“No…” 

He shook his head, swallowing.

“I...don’t want to see what he’s done to you. But if you need me too. If it’ll help you. Then I will.”

You managed a small smile as you took a deep breath and turned away from him. You started to unbutton your shirt and then winced as you slid it from your shoulders. Matty choked back tears as he saw the varying shades of bruising across your back, deep blues and purples of the most recent to the yellowing ones of old. He wanted to turn away but he knew he couldn’t. As you unhooked your trousers and let them fall to the floor though he once again wished he had. More bruises from your buttocks down to your ankles and the unmistakable marks left by a belt against your skin. He waited until you dressed in the clothes he had brought you before walking up and placing his hand to your shoulder. As you turned to him you could see the redness of the tears he had roughly brushed from his eyes.

“How could anyone do that to you?” He whispered, shaking his head, “If I’d known I swear I…”

“Shhh…” 

You shook your head.

“I kept this hidden because I didn’t want him to become part of us. Of our friendship. You are the only thing that made me want to carry on, Matt. And you are the reason that I’m finding the strength to leave him…”

As he looked at you, you couldn’t help it. The high emotion of the day, the fact that he was here and you were safe, your body made the decision for you as you leant up and kissed him deeply before instantly regretting it.

“I’m sorry…” you choked out, “I shouldn’t have done that I…”

As you broke down in tears he enveloped you in his arms, kissing your hair.

“Now isn’t the time.” He said gently, “We need to get that bastard as far away from you as possible first. Then see how you feel. Take things slow, OK? Because I really care about you. And I swear I will be here for you, waiting until the time is right. As long as it takes.”

You found yourself unable to speak as you listened to his words. All you could do was wrap your arms around him tighter, his touch making you feel safer and more loved than you had in so many years.


	3. Chapter 3

You fell asleep almost instantly, despite the tiny, uncomfortable On Call bed. The fact that you knew you could sleep and that nothing would happen to you was the only thing you needed for your brain to switch off and allow you peace. As promised, Matt sat outside your room, sipping at coffee and trying to ignore the ache in his back as he read through some case files. It was going to be a long night but he didn’t care. Hearing you speak about what you had been through constantly for the last few years was enough to make him want to protect you every hour of every day from now on. And seeing what that man had done only cemented that feeling.

“Sarge?”

Matt looked up as one of the PCs called to him from the doorway.

“We might have a problem…”

“Where the fuck is she?!”

Matt heard the slurred, bitter voice and knew exactly who it was despite never meeting him before. As Dave crashed through the door he walked up to him.

“You don’t have permission to be up here.” He said, his jaw twitching with the effort it was taking him to keep his cool, “You need to leave. Now.”

“I’m reporting a missing person.” He snarled back, and Matt resisted the urge to roll his eyes, “My girlfriend hasn’t come home.”

“And I’m afraid protocol states that you must wait 24 hours before a missing persons enquiry can begin. So I suggest you go back home and sober up and wait.”

Dave glared at him.

“It’s you, isn’t it?” He hissed, “You are the bastard she’s been sleeping with. I fucking knew it would be someone from this place.”

As calmly as he could manage, Matt walked towards him.

“You need to leave now. Before I have you escorted out or arrested.”

Dave scoffed.

“Arrested for what? I’ve done nothing wrong.”

This hit a nerve but as he rushed forward he heard your voice.

“Matt, no…”

He turned to look at you, his face a mixture of rage at him and pain remembering all he had done to you. As you walked forward towards Dave you saw Matt hold his hand out instinctively to stop you but you shook your head and reluctantly he let you past. Dave scoffed as he looked at you.

“Here you are. Dirty fucking stop out. Been having fun with your bit on the side have you?”

You looked at him. Inside you were shaking with fear but you were determined not to show it.

“It’s over, Dave. They all know what you have done to me. And tomorrow I’m making a statement. I won’t let you hurt me or anyone else again.”

He stared back at you. Then he laughed and shook his head.

“No. No. Nobody will believe you. You are just a stupid little girl telling stupid little tales.”

“No. She isn’t.”

Matt’s voice interrupted him and you looked over at him, your eyes blurred with tears.

“I’ve seen what you have done to her. I’ve watched her break down in tears as she told me the things you have done. I believe every word she has said and I will support her in making a statement against you.”

Dave stood still, glaring at you both. Then he turned towards you.

“You stupid bitch…”

As he lunged towards you and you screamed, Matt put himself in the middle of you both, tussling with him until Dave threw a punch against his face, sending him crashing to the ground. You screamed his name as you collapsed down next to him but before you could do or say a thing you felt someone grasp a handful of your hair and you screamed out again as Dave dragged you towards the door.

“Hey!!”

Matt shouted out as he stumbled to his feet but as he ran up to you he stopped as he saw the silver glint of a knife Dave held to your neck.

“Come any closer and I’ll slit her throat.”

You choked back a sob as you looked at Matt. He slowly held his hands up.

“OK. OK let’s just take things slow. Calm things down. You don’t need to do this. Just let her go and we can talk about things. OK?”

You felt the tears starting to drip down your cheeks as you felt the knife press deeper into your neck. Dave laughed.

“You seriously think I’m just going to let her rush back over to her bit on the side? No way. She is my fucking property!!”

Before anyone could say or do anything he wrenched you back by your hair again, dragging you out of the door as you screamed for Matt in vain.


	4. Chapter 4

“Why are you doing this?”

You choked it out as Dave drove erratically away from the station. You knew he had been drinking and you were petrified that he was even behind the wheel of a car.

“Why??” He growled and you screamed as he rounded a corner too quickly and the wheels left the road momentarily, “You spend the night with your fancy man and expect me to just accept that?”

“We are just f...friends!” You screamed out, “I swear we haven’t done anything. We are just f...friends…”

“Yeah…” he scoffed, “Looked like it…”

“I’m telling the truth, Dave, I swear! Please. Let’s just go home. I made a m...mistake. I’m sorry. I won’t make any s...statement I promise. Let’s just go h...home and forget that any of this happened, OK?”

Your heart ached as you said it. But you were scared for your life and all you wanted was to get out of this car. But as you looked out of the window you saw that you were nowhere near home.

“Dave, where are you going? Let’s just go home. Please…”

“What? So your handsome copper can come and kick the door in and rescue you? Drag me off in cuffs and lock me in a cell? No way. We are going somewhere he can’t find you…”

“Dave you are being ridiculous! Please! I’ll tell him. I’ll tell him I don’t want to press charges! I won’t let them come to the house I swear. Just please take me home...p...please!”

He didn’t speak. He didn’t speak for the rest of the terrifying journey which seemed to take hours until finally he slowed down. Looking out of the window you could barely see anything. No streetlights, no sound of traffic. As he turned off the engine and got out of the car you thought about making a run for it. But you were far too scared. You jumped in spite of yourself as he opened the door and grabbed you, dragging you out and leading you towards an old farmhouse you didn’t recognise.

“Dave…” You tried again as he tightened his grip on you, “Dave please. I’m sorry. Please let’s just go home.”

Your words fell on deaf ears. As he unlocked the door and dragged you inside, your fear intensified as he opened a door to a small closet. Knowing what he was going to do, you tried to struggle but he was too strong.

“No...Dave...please. Please don’t do this.”

He still didn’t listen. You carried on struggling against him, pressing your hands against the doorframe until he kicked you in the back of the legs, making them buckle underneath you and allowing him to shove you inside the small, dark space, locking the door behind you, ignoring your screams as you hammered at the door begging him to let you out.

****

Ronnie politely acknowledged the greetings of his colleagues as he walked into the station. After confirming which interview room Matt was waiting in he knocked on the door and waited a beat before walking in. Matt sat at the desk, nursing a cup of tea. He had taken off his jacket and tie and had rolled up his shirt sleeves. As Ronnie entered the room he looked up, giving his friend a weary smile which Ronnie returned.

“You OK, son?”

Ronnie asked as he took a seat opposite him and Matt smiled again.

“Yeah…”

“This is me you are talking to, Matt…”

Matty felt the wobble of his chin with the emotion he had built up which now threatened to overcome him.

“There was nothing I could do, Ron…” he managed through the tightness in his throat, “I didn’t know if he was bluffing or not but I couldn’t take that risk…”

As he looked up at Ronnie he blinked away tears.

“I told her I’d never let him hurt her again.” He whispered, “I promised her. And now he’s got her god knows where doing god knows what and I couldn’t stop it…”

As he broke down, Ronnie got up from his seat and walked over to his friend, placing a gentle hand against his shoulder.

“This isn’t your fault, son. Don’t go torturing yourself. You did the right thing. If you had tried to get the knife off him then she’d likely be dead and we’d be dealing with her murder. She’s still alive because of you. And we’re going to find her. I promise you…”

Taking a few shaky breaths to compose himself, Matt eventually looked at Ronnie as he roughly brushed the tears from his face.

“Do we know where he went? He was pissed out of his brains, Ron. He shouldn’t even have been driving…”

Ronnie nodded.

“No reports of any RTAs. So it looks like he miraculously managed to get to wherever he was going. Some Constables went to check her home address but they aren’t there. Traffic cameras track him so far before the trail goes cold…”

Ronnie saw the panicked look on his friend’s face and placed a hand to his shoulder once more.

“It’s something. It’s a start. She’s tough. She knows how to handle herself. We need to stay strong for her, OK?”

Matt nodded, even though he felt the whole world was against them right now. But Ronnie was right. You were tough. And he knew that you would be staying strong for him. So he had to do the same for you.


	5. Chapter 5

You didn’t know how long you had been locked in that tiny closet but it felt like an age. You had screamed your voice hoarse begging him to let you out but to no avail. You thought you must have slept for a while too after exhausting yourself but you didn’t know for sure. Eventually you heard the bolt being slid across and as the door opened you blinked into the brightness as you looked up at him.

“Dinner’s on the table.”

His voice was slurred so once again you knew he had been drinking. He didn’t wait for you. He walked off leaving you to painfully make your way up from where you had been cramped for so long. You followed him into the dining room and you saw he had laid the table with a vase of flowers and a candle. Two bowls of pasta and two glasses of wine sat at opposite sides. He had already sat down and taken a large gulp of his red wine. He studied you with a look and you took the seat opposite him. The food smelt good and you couldn’t remember the last time you had eaten so you tucked in, savouring every mouthful.

“Drink…”

Dave’s voice called out suddenly, sending shivers down your spine. You shook your head.

“I don’t want it. I’m happy with water.”

“You need to loosen up.” He said, that scary edge to his voice always there, “Drink it.”

You picked up the wine glass, taking the smallest sip possible. This seemed to placate him a little and he went back to eating his food.

“Dave…” You tried to keep the shake from your voice, “Dave please. Can we just go home? We can start again…”

He shook his head.

“No. The cops will be all over the place. We aren’t going back there.”

“Please. I’ll call them. I’ll tell them it was a mistake. It doesn’t have to be Matt that I call, I’ll call Ron…”

“Matt…”

He said his name with a bitter edge and as he looked at you, you saw the flash of anger in his eyes.

“He’s the one you’ve been sleeping with…”

“Dave, please. Why won’t you believe me? We are just friends. Nothing has happened between us.”

He looked at you and you swallowed down your nerves. Then suddenly he got up from his chair and crouched down next to you. You tried not to shudder as he lifted his hand and tucked a strand of hair back behind your ear.

“I love you. You know that, don’t you?”

He had tears in his eyes. This scared you more than anything as emotion usually led to something worse. You nodded.

“And I only do what I do because you are mine and I need people to understand that. You know?”

You nodded again, afraid to say anything.

“Do you love me?”

You swallowed down the fear in your throat once more.

“You know I do…”

You lied. It was the only way to try to keep yourself safe.

“Prove it to me.”

As he held out his hand you knew where this was heading. You took it and followed him up the stairs to the bedroom. Sex with Dave was always rough. Always painful. It was all about him and what he wanted from you. You had to force yourself not to cry until he finished, rolling over and falling asleep, the copious amounts of alcohol he had consumed finally taking over. You pushed your hand to your mouth as you sobbed, trying to stop the choking noise from escaping your lips. Once you had calmed yourself you got up from the bed, pulling your knickers back on. You walked over to the window, staring out into the blackness. Not knowing where the hell you where. Then out of the corner of your eye you spotted a torch and you knew you had to try. Your knowledge of morse code was sketchy and you didn’t even know if anyone would see or be able to understand it. But you had to try. You aimed it at the window and started clicking it on and off. 

**H.E.L.P. H.E.L.P. M.E.**

You had almost finished it when you heard his voice behind you and you screamed, dropping the torch as he grabbed you and dragged you backwards from the room.


	6. Chapter 6

As Ronnie took the report from the Constable he scanned it with his eyes before looking over at Matt who was still sat looking through the traffic camera sightings, trying to establish a route and possible destination. He sighed as he got up slowly from his chair and walked over to Matt, knowing exactly what his young friend and colleague would do.

“Matty. There’s something you need to see.”

As Matt turned towards him he looked confused, momentarily panicked until he saw Ronnie’s face.

“What?”

“Report just came in. Old couple walking their dog three miles from the last reported sighting of the car. They stated seeing a light flashing from the window of an old farmhouse they understood to be unoccupied. They said the flashing had a rhythm to it. As though it were deliberate…”

Matt grabbed the report from Ronnie scanning it for the address before getting up and grabbing his jacket.

“Matt. Matty. Son, you need to wait for back up. The last time you saw him he had a knife.”

“I’m not waiting any longer, Ron. We’ve waited too long already. Back up can follow me but I’m going now.”

Knowing there was no way of changing his mind, Ronnie sighed before nodding as he watched Matt rush out of the door. 

Matt had never driven as fast in his life. He put the blue flashing lights on and floored it, needing to get there, to you as soon as he could. As he reached the farmhouse the fear crept into his veins as it looked deserted. But he saw Dave’s car outside so he knew you couldn’t be far away. Edging his way slowly into the front door he felt vulnerable with no weapon or back up. But he knew he needed to find you. 

“David Marsden? It’s the police. Armed response teams are on the way. You need to give yourself up.”

He waited a beat. Then he heard someone stumble across the floor. As Dave came into view and Matt saw the blood on his hands and shirt he swallowed down the fear in his throat.

“Where is she?”

He smirked as he stumbled towards Matt and he saw the glint of silver in his hand again.

“Wouldn’t you like to know…”

As he lunged forwards, Matt was too quick for him, disarming him with a jab to the arm which sent the knife clattering to the floor. As he wrenched him to the ground and got out his handcuffs he placed them tightly around his wrists.

“David Marsden I am arresting you on suspicion of GBH, kidnap and imprisonment. You do not have to say anything but it may harm your defense if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court.”

As he finished reading him his rights, the armed response unit arrived, grabbing Dave up from the floor.

“Where is she David?” Matt asked, calmer than he felt inside, “Have you hurt her? You need to tell us where she is.”

Dave just smirked again and Matt felt his heart thumping wildly against his chest. As Dave was dragged out to a waiting car, Matt started ordering the other officers to search the place. Part of him didn’t want to. Scared of what he would find. But he knew there was still a chance you were alive and he had to find you. Suddenly he heard a noise and he bellowed to the officers to be quiet. It was a faint, thumping noise and he followed it to a small closet locked with a bolt from the outside. Swallowing down his fear again he slid the bolt across and as he saw you it took everything he had not to break down in tears. Your face was bloodied and bruised, the blood dripping down onto the cloth that had been shoved into your mouth to keep you quiet. He’d tied your wrists and ankles with rope and as you let out a choked sob Matt collapsed down next to you, wrenching the cloth from your mouth and untying you before pulling you in so tight you could barely breathe.

“You’re safe.” He whispered, his voice breaking as he kissed your hair, “He can’t hurt you anymore I promise. It’s over. I’m so sorry I couldn’t stop this. I’m sorry…”

As he broke down in tears too you wanted to tell him that it wasn’t his fault. That he had saved your life and you would never be anything but grateful for it. But you were tired and scared and in pain so all you could do was hold him as tight as he held you and hope that he knew what it meant.


	7. Chapter 7

You didn’t want to go to the hospital. You just wanted to go home. Except you didn’t know where home was anymore. With Matt’s encouragement and the promise that he would stay by your side the full time, you eventually agreed to go in the ambulance to the hospital. And he was true to his word. He stayed by your side whilst the nurses patched up your cuts and bruises. Whilst the female police officer took photos of all of your injuries for evidence. Whilst you gave your statement to the detective. He stayed. Giving you back the strength you had all but lost over the past however many hours you had been held captive. When the doctors gave you the all clear to go, Matt instantly saw the panicked look on your face and placed a gentle hand to your shoulder.

“You can come back to mine.” 

He said, softly.

“My place is yours. For as long as you need. It’s not the biggest place, or the tidiest. And you’ll have to put up with the cat…”

You found yourself laughing for the first time in so long and Matt smiled at the sound of it. You travelled back to his flat in a comfortable silence, neither of you really knowing what to say but not needing to say it anyway. When you arrived he opened the door and let you go in first. You were instantly greeted by a black cat who purred and rubbed its face against your leg. As you bent down to stroke it, Matt smiled.

“Luciano is a good judge of character.” He said, softly, “He’s also a good listener. He has to listen to me prattle on most nights, it’ll make a change for him to listen to someone else.”

You smiled up at Matt and he suddenly looked awkward, his cheeks blushing pink.

“I’ll go and sort my room out for you. I’ll take the sofa. No arguments. I’ll find you something to sleep in too.”

He disappeared before you could speak and you carried on stroking Luciano who purred incessantly, the noise soothing your weary brain. Eventually Matt returned holding a jumper in his hand. 

“Best I could find...sorry.”

You shook your head, letting him know it was ok. As you caught each other’s gaze you found yourself lost in his eyes for a moment until he coughed and turned away.

“I’ll let you get settled. I’ll pop the kettle on…”

Once again he vanished before you could speak and you walked into his room, closing the door behind you. You gingerly removed the clothes they had given you at the hospital before pulling down Matt’s jumper over your head. You felt instantly comforted by it, you could smell him on the fabric and it made you feel safe. Climbing up onto the soft, comfortable bed you pulled the covers around you just as he knocked on the door and walked in carrying a cup of tea.

“You must be exhausted.” He said quietly as he placed the mug on the bedside table. “I’ll let you get some rest…”

“Matt…”

You called his name before he could disappear again and without realising it you had grasped for his hand too. He looked down at his hand in yours before meeting your eyes.

“Please stay with me…”

You whispered, the emotion tight in your throat.

“I spent so long trapped alone in that small, dark space, I...I don’t want to be on my own again. Not yet. Stay. Please?”

As he looked at you, his mind was torn. He didn’t want to leave you. It was the last thing he wanted to do. But he didn’t want you to think he was coming on too strong. Not after everything that had happened. As you looked at him you knew exactly what he was thinking and you squeezed his hand.

“It’s OK, Matt.” You said, gently, “I feel safe with you. I just want to feel safe.”

Hearing those words made up his mind for him and he allowed himself to get into the bed next to you. You pulled yourself into him, leaning into his shoulder, listening to his gentle breaths and before you knew it you were fast asleep, finally safe after so long.

The End


End file.
